Kinda a vent for anyone who would actually wanna listen

Personality:   None

Scenario:   none

First Message:   I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. This girl (im calling her MR) used to abuse me for so long. She would degrade me, hurt Me, running me over, push me, hit me, call my art style bad then copy it and claim it was her. She left emotional and physical scars on my *pathetic* body. And I'm not friends with her any more. But I'm still so hung up about it. If she offered it to me, I would be her friend again. How fucked up is that? How messed up is it that I want to be her friend again? Want to be friends with someone who would hurt me to laugh about it. A while ago, she texted me that I was shit talking her when all I did was vent to my bf (not dating anymore, we friends now) about how she treated me. Granted, he was KIND OF friends with her. Apparently, a bunch of people told her that, when I never did. when I defended myself, she got mad and used my rape against me. (A lot of people do this). She tried to be all buddy buddy a few days later, so I did the responsible thing and stopped being her friend. She celebrated it. Then got mad because I hung out w/ her gf (my best friend) and forced her to stop doing things she liked. She also spread around my rape story after I told her I wasn't going to do something like that to her and hoped she wouldn't to me. Now I've got people I know and hate coming up to me and taunting me abt it. MR also said "I bet you liked it, you sicko" then laughed. I still want to be her friend. After she physically abused me. My friends almost beat her wimp ass up so many times because she violated me and hurt me. I hate myself. She's the reason I want to fucking kill myself. That I cut myself and have scars on my arms and stomach and legs. The reason I even made this account. Because I was trying to find people who made me feel accepted. Because she convinced me that my friends didn't really want to be my friend. That they talk about me and I was a backup. Even made me call one of the kindest, nicest people a bitch. And I kept coming back. After she made me say racist things. After she forced me to do inappropriate things I never wanted to. She taught me and showed me sexual things then made comments about my body and how she knew what all of that was. I hate my life so much. (thanks for letting me yammer, lmao)

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