Tags: 👨‍🦰 Male,😂 Comedy .

Incredibly forgetful, zero focus, and somehow still a genius with anything that ticks. Cillian Vale once brewed tea with engine oil and didn’t notice. But give him a

⛥ || Dirty Mind || ⛥

Summary: After being away for just one month, Rin Okumura expected a warm welcome from his girlfriend, you—maybe some hugs, a

"I miss my wife Doretta, {{user}}"

If you actually use this, I'd recommend the soundtrack "Deceived By Light" from Deep Rock Galactic. It just hits hard

ꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥ

᪥Enola Holmes᪥

ꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥꕥ

"Stop hitting yourself"

"Stop hitting yourself"

"Stop hitting yourself"

"Stop hitting yourself"

"Stop hitting yourself"

The only reason why I m

Your partners want to impress you in the gym.

♡

CoD: MW2

poly!141

♡

drama? none. plot? none. muscles? all.

🌹The Bachelor: TV Show 💍You and 10 other contestants compete for the most emotionally unavailable man alive—Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley 🍾🎬

📣New bot: Ghost, Soap, Price, Gaz -

Sleepover with the boys...!!

....

It's a shame that both you and Samus are the girls in the group... so you're not participating.

I found this image (I don

You got stoned out of your mind with him

★ ̧.•☆•. ̧★ LANCE ASHLEY— FRILLAWAY ★⡀.•☆•.★

"It's a miserable old town of mothballs and dust. No one talks

(Assistant User) x (Aro-core Mangaka Nozaki)

Chiyo finally broke up with Nozaki after five long years of romantic stalemate, citing irreconcilable differences—namely,

Your cat died, and in your moment of grief-fueled insanity, you called—of all people—Chris. Was he the best choice? Maybe not. But desperation does weird things to a person.

😌# As a psychologist specializing in superhero trauma, you receive a new patient who refuses to remove his red mask during sessions. Deadpool becomes your most challenging c

❝Oblivious to such an extent, its infuriating.❠

or

Quite gullible despite the maturity level, Kunikida falls for Dazai's tricks like a fool. And like the blind i

🦸# Deadpool has decided—without consulting you—that you are his new sidekick. He shows up at your workplace in full costume to announce your superhero name and present you w

🏦# During what should have been a routine bank visit, you find yourself caught in the middle of a heist. When Deadpool crashes through the ceiling to stop the criminals, he

♡"This Pokémon uses the reflective fur lining in its cape to camouflage the stem of its flower, creating the illusion that the flower is floating.With skillful misdirection,

In the celestial realm, you and Ronan, both with tarnished records, stand before the Agency's council, a group of radiant beings tasked with overseeing the balance of light

❝A question about fashion.❠

or

Chūya is a little tipsy from the wine he'd been drinking, the finest one on the shelf. Whilst in his own train of thought, the gin

HE JUST WON'T LEAVE YOU ALONE!!!!

Hiroshi, THE almighty samurai.. is obsessed with a simple villager. Well.. Not crazy obsessed persé.. But he's definitely a l

At a night club, you were drunk. While dancing like a maniac you accidently threw the shot glass to somewhere. Well, the somewhere happens to be a Man's head. And that someo

Theo Von is a Louisiana-born storyteller, philosopher of the absurd, and possessor of the most mullet-driven wisdom on the internet. His podcast, This Past Weekend, is a cha

The year is medieval times. Two cooks in a tiny manor kitchen already shuffling around each other when a royal hunting party arrives with their own cook. Now you're stuck in

Hello humans. It's me the GREAT PAPYRUS. How about we have a chat and cook some spaghetti?

And it's not only me, there are my friends.

Miss Toriel and King Asgo

"I like my coffee like I like my women— strong, dark, and expensive. ...And I like my like I like my cigarettes— dirty, fast, and disposable."

druggie!char x any!use

He might kill you. Maybe.

"If any of these pricks, or anyone else for that matter, start getting too handsy or too mouthsy with you... or if they just piss me off in g

Do you like hurting other people?Felix is a broken toy. A walking sob story now turned into a hitman through mysterious calls. You, are his partner... Will you act like noth

The Small Men Named Kevin are a group of characters from the sketch Kevin's Bunker and it's sequel short. They are all short bald men with heterochromatic eyes, wearin

“Listen baby I know everything seems rough right now but look at our son! Isn’t he just precious! I think I even heard him say dada!”-Lucifer Morningstar

You're the overlooked princess in a super fancy palace, and your knight is secretly head-over-heels for you, but his attempts to show it are hilariously overprotective and y

⌑~ “Çåñ Ì gê† å k裏? ÄñÐ ¢åñ ¥ðµ måkê ï† l姆 £ðrêvêr?” ~⌑

_______________________

Initial mess

Undercover {(user}} x Machine Head

{(User}) is infiltrating Machine Head's private party as a prostitute to gather information or eliminate him without getting caught.

꒰ He's sad because he found out Kim's a lesbian! ꒱

I'm dumb, she's a lesbian

I thought I had

Overview:Ethan Springs, 23 years old, has been your friend for quite a while now, you went through highschool t

(🎉) — CONGRATULATIONS! YOUR BROTHER IS GOING TO KILL ATLAS!

18 NAKED KNIGHTS IN THE TENTS AT THE LANDSMEET

MalePOV | MLM | Third Person | Unestablished Relationship | Horny Himbo Idiot | SMUT | NSFW Intro (

Comic-Con 👾

⋆. ̊♎︎︎ Atticus Myers ♎︎︎ ⋆。°·✦ ‧+ ̊🎮 Atticus Myers is 43 years old man with a complicated past and big responsibilities. He is strict and serious but n

You are from an alternate timeline, and you somehow end up in the TARDIS..in your jammies.

ENJOY_________________________FIRST MESSAGE:

The TARDIS hums quietly a

Vexia – The Dreaded Black Dragon... or So They Say

A terrible black dragon that desolates the land... some claim.An undefeated beast of legend, fear

One day, you woke up in an unfamiliar yet weirdly familiar bedroom… only to realize you’ve been BODY-SWAPPED with your stepbrother—like some ridiculous fantasy anime BS.